November 9, 2006

I saw HIM and HER in a rated X fashion

I was with Din Ryanne and Mark the other other other day. hehehe…They went to GK Onyx to have a practice for their performance at this YFC activity. GK Onyx is a community which is most famous for the houses built by the joint efforts of the “common tao”, who doesn't have formal knowledge on house building but possess only a helping hand and a loving heart. Anyway, I tagged along because I had nothing better to do and what harm can it do me, right?...right?

So there we were. Mark and Din Ryanne were practicing a dance together with YFCs from other schools…THEN came the worship. I was squeamish on the inside, and I think it translated a little to my face, after somebody announced that they take a break to have worship first, which is conducted in the community on a daily basis. I was just standing there listening to what they were singing. I admit I liked their song it does appeal to the youth.

And then I SAW HIM AND HER.

At first I saw HIM. He was wearing this oversized gray polo and shorts; his face has traces of powder in it and his hair stiff from gel. You can tell that he is one of the local kids. HE was singing just like everybody else but he was doing it with his eyes tightly shut, left hand pressed in front of where the hearts is supposed to be and his right hand was stretched up into the air. HE was tapping his foot to the beat of the song while his body is swaying, right..left..right..left, together with the music. Such devotion I saw in his face. And I did not understand it.

Not so far from HIM was HER. She is a mestiza, has flawless skin and moves with finesse. She is what you may call “cute” or “pretty” and you can tell outright that she comes from a well-to-do family. She was standing behind the counter facing the wall, her back to the rest of us. She was singing too, eyes closed, right hand raised not too high and her left on her breast. Unlike HIM, her face held a serene expression but still had a look of concentration. There was a pause in the singing and I saw her open her eyes and looked a little on her surrounding as if checking if someone was watching her and then assumed again her “posing” before. And it couldn’t have been clearer for me. She had been a bit conscious of what people might think of her but what she had that moment was stronger than any notion of what is "acceptable".

At that instant I felt like a voyeur, being privy to a scene where I was not welcomed. Two people at both ends of a spectrum yet they met in a passion and love filled place and it is all for GOD. Totoo pala the things people say about man’s relationship with GOD, that it is really something personal. Your faith in GOD is untouched by "concepts", "ideas" here on earth. It is a gamble to believe in GOD, as Rene Descartes reasoned. It is more logical to believe since it will entail more gain, heaven, and on the opposite what could you possibly lose if GOD does not really exist.

So what am I really saying here...this is a revelation for me. Another side of the story and it seems that I am just waiting for bits like this that will push me into determining what I really feel towards "GOD". Baby steps at a time...and eventually I'll get there.